Level Two. Grandparent Stress.
By Michelle Lloyd.
New One loved his Grandma. She was, as had been told of multiple times, an incredibly positive person in life. He loved her. She loved him. The arrangement was a lovable one, on both sides.
New One felt he was incredibly privileged to have his grandparent there for him when he needed and ever since she had married, the love had doubled. He had been worried about his grandmother being on her own and since married to Little Herbert’s grandfather, those worries had dissipated.
Before that marriage, he had been slightly OTT on the worries side. Grandma lived on her own prior to her second wedding and when New One thought about it, he believed this must have been so lonely for her.
New One loved to have full on quality time with Lana, his dog, and he nearly always had a mum or a dad with him. At school there was Little Herbert and R V to hang about with, he had to admit that whenever he could he would be with someone. Poor Grandma, he felt, did not have that at her disposal and New One was not at all sure that this was right.
New One decided that on one visit, when he saw his grandma, he would apply his concern campaign to her and so it began…when New One’s grandma came for a visit New One practically leapt into action. He was with her when she had a chat with his mum, with her when she went to have a look at his latest project, he knew he could not be with her when she had to pay a little visit to the ladies’ room and so he sent Lana, his dog with her for that particular part of her visit.
New One thought it was all going well but the only problem was that grandma did not seem to think so, she kept giving him little but significant unsure looks and when Lana was sent with her, the whole tripping over her tail issue did not seem to make anything less awkward.
New One persisted in his attempts not to leave his grandma and persisted in her difficulty to understand what was going on and why she could not be left to talk with New One’s mum, despite it being a talk on a subject she knew New One found tiresome. New One felt tired by all the talk of the adults and but as time moved on he did not have it in him to leave grandma’s side.
It all came to a bit of a breaking point when grandma got up and became startled by both Lana and New One standing to attention and then seeming to join at the hip with her as she made her journey to greet her son-in-law who had got home.
It was the time for questions and grandma was the one to do the questioning. What was going on and why had everyone suddenly seemed so keen on accompanying her?
New One confessed all. It took some probing from mum and poignantly questioning looks from dad but in the end the justification for his actions came out. New One found grandma’s smiling face, a relief. She hugged him and loved him and tried to explain that being sure someone was not lonely did not mean he had to physically be with her all of the time. There were times for being alone and they could be good, but also times when they could mutually seek each other out. New One felt reassured and relieved by what grandma had to say and finally he could spend time with his grandma without worry.
It had all been a bit of a learning experience. Even grandma getting married again had been about learning and looking to a new family unit. New One was keen to get his worries under control and so too, adjust to his fantastic and fabulous grandma’s ways.